How world wars are started:

Wow I cant believe what happened today. After school I went over to Bryans house and then all of a sudden I started crying. And we all know how I NEVER cry, even the saddest movie wont do it for me. I didnt even cry at my great grandpa's funeral or anything like that. I dont know why I started crying, it was more of a mini-breakdown. Man.......... I feel so embarrased/bad about it. Not only did I cry and be a complete loser, I couldnt talk about it afterwards. Now I just have a mind full of ten million thoughts that will make there way out into the world in some form or another.

Blame it on me

I think I may have found my calling in life. You know how Im all like "I want to become a pharmacy technician" and blah blah blah well.... damnit Im going to become one and thats final. I have some strange obsession with pills I've realized. And vitamins for that matter. In fact if I could live off pills and vitamins I probably would, I dont know why. Today I bought Kelp pills and vitamin C chewables. The Kelp pills are supposed to help with my bad circulation, but I realized that they are much better than that, its delightful. Plus they actually smell like seaweeds, its kinda gross and the only bad thing about them. ALthough I must admit they are much better than my vitamin B1's... dear god those things are wretched. The Vitamin C chewables are yummy. Garrett gave me one a couple of weeks ago, so I had to go and buy my own, well actually bryan bought them for me.

Wow this was a total post about my intake of useless pills. Arn't you happy you read this?

I also bought fish, chocolate and 2 dvd's, eternal sunshine of the spotless mind and pulp fiction. We were going to go see The Aviator, but it ended too late, and it was tuesday so I wanted to buy fish since they were 50% off.

I wrote the news today

Yesterday was really quite fun. Hmm where did I last leave off actually? Friday was cool, I actually hung out with scott for lunch too... and I got icecream from Nathan. He came to the pool hall with everybody else that always goes too. Then during second block of Bio all me and bryan did was fool around, and he made a cool design on my binder.
I went over to his house after school for a couple of hours, then ran off to the mall where I had to meet my sister and parents. They had a tiger in the mall this weekend. Of course it was caged and then caged again, but it kinda caught me off guard when I walk into the mall then all of a sudden right after silver sense spot a tiger just lying there on the floor. Friday night I saw The ring 2, it was pretty good, just as good as the first one if I do say so.
Saturday morning I woke up and had to go over to my grandma's for lunch. I straightened my hair first though... not that it mattered by the end of the day, but o well. Then I met bryan at the mall and I had to finish buying some things, then we went back to his house. We got off of the bus at the lesure center because we didnt have another transfer. So we had to walk a bit in the snow... and let me tell you I was freezing by the time we got to his house because he kept throwing snow at me. I got him worse though.. mwhahaha.
We actually sat down and watched an actual movie. The whole thing, it was almost a miracle, or at least one of those once in a lifetime moments. His parents were home so I guess that would be why. We watched shaun of the dead. Then his parents left... and we ended up being late for the hockey game that we were going to that night. And we had another snow fight as we were waiting for the bus. I pushed him right down into this big snow bank... then kicked snow all over him and he came and wouldnt let go of me and made me freeze.
We got to the hockey game at the second period and ate sooo much. Hot dog, chocolate bar, popcorn... and I almost had Icecream but I was too full. It was fun.
Then I had to work this morning so I wasnt allowed to go to Niki's for a show last night........ o well. I dont know her all too well.. but so far im not a big fan of her, even though shes supposed to do a tarot reading for me sometime.

mmmm water

I feel so sick.... it sucks. And the whole thing I was trying to pull off today didnt really work. I think I have these vibes that emit from me, so when I dont want something or dont want people to talk about stuff , it happens, it happens, it happens, and worse than it would on a normal day. People are just assholes. .... Its annoying and makes me ill. The head stress is also unbearable.
I came home this afternoon and slept. I think I have a problem, all I ever seem to want to do is sleep. It agrivates me, I cant even watch a movie anymore without sleeping partway through it. Even if its a really good one. I need to go to the doctor.
I also went out to Perkins for supper and got practically yelled at cause I wasnt eating.... I hope to god my parents dont go down THAT road again... cause I've been there done that.

I thought you should know your not making this easy.

Well............ what the hell am I supposed to do now?
I hate it when plans, ideas, things change. Sure it may bring good things, but it sure makes me confused. And we all know how much I hate to be confused.
So today Bryan brings up the idea that hes moving to calgary right after grad.... riiiight. He says that I should come along too. But there is one small problem with that. Well actually there are many.
1. I have no money
2. I cant drive
3. I dont know anywhere I would stay
4. I wouldnt be allowed
5. Even if I was allowed I wouldnt be able to stay with bryan cause the convo with my mother at jysk the other day didnt go over too well when I brought up the idea of me ever moving in with bryan in the near future. Apparently I have to be married before I can move in with my boyfriend.
6. I have no clue where I would work
7. Im not ready to move out on my own considering Im only 17


SOO in all it just DOESN'T WORK, but I guess if he really wants to its not like I can stop him. Even though I'd probably end up being selfish and going "when you leave, dont expect me to wait for you." Cause trust me... I can go off right now if I wanted to, but I choose not to.

No matter how hard I beg or scream or cry..... they wont let me drop chemistry and its making me mad. hhahah Im totally lame... you know what Im going to do. Not do anywork.. that way either my teacher will call my parents and let me drop it, or kick me out saying that I suck too much to be in there. Although today I did have a cheesecake moment. Theres this annoying Eric kid that sits next to me, hes in grd 11. Basically all of my class is grd 11s but anyways. Hes always telling me what to do and how to do it properly, and sometimes he looks over at my work and then tells me everything thats wrong with it in this "im so much better than you" way. Ao today when we got our tests back guess who got the 71% while he only got 63%.... yes it was me.
But then matt got to work my homework and gave me 1/20 on it.... yeah how kind of him. Especially after taking his shift last night.

Damn right Its better than yours

la la la... Guess what I decided to make last night. Yes thats right, this years Patio furniture of luck. I miss my old one.. that one was the prettiest. This one says "breathe life into your summer" instead of "Spend the summer your way." o well.... Im gonna put one in my agenda... and then keep the other picture with me at ALLLLL times.
Today I got to play pool with about 10 guys... and two icky girls... and It was funny listening to kolby bitch about them in the car on the way back to school. Hes so gorgeous, and I have his math book... hehe

Bandages on my legs and my arms from you

I had to go to the dentist today.... god damnit, does no one understand that I cant have plans on wednesdays!?? I guess not... o well Im over it I suppose... Ill just have to listen to Indie music and get it out of my system... *sigh*

I got a cleaning done.... now I can have sparkly teeth for my grad pictures on sunday, so says my mom. Now all im left with besides normal teeth is a gap on my two bottom teeth.. always happens after a cleaning. Its odd looking.

The other day I went to go see Ong-Bak and it was surprisingly quite good and interesting. Before that we had supper and played a fun game called transfer the ice cube.... only we didnt play the way it sounds... that would be level 3 and we were only on level 1... anyways.. that got put off to the side when I looked over and then just shouted "Eww".... and apparently I was really loud.. Its not my fault people just disgust me.

I should have keyed his car.. but that would have been too obvious.
Sabrina was working that day too and she got to meet bryan..